They say I wipe butts all day, that I'm overworked and underpaid. But when we're honest, that caregiver in the memory care unit or assisted living facility your Mom lives in is underappreciated for the things they do.
That caregiver spends the night with your mother, helping her to and from her bedroom, and comforting her when she misses her husband who died not that long ago.
That caregiver works 8, 10, 12, and 16 hour days.
That caregiver gets your mother up in the morning for breakfast, making sure she gets her coffee or tea, and her breakfast just the way she likes it.
That caregiver doesn't get paid very much.
That caregiver makes sure your mother takes her medication, and is patient when it takes half an hour for her to down that 5 pills.
That caregiver gives your mother a hug in the morning and at night, and tells her that they love her.
That caregiver does your mothers hair in the morning, and helps her get dressed.
That caregiver knows what will make your mother smile when she is having a bad day, and can make her laugh.
That caregiver might be having a bad day, but is still at work, caring for your mother.
That caregiver paints your mother's nails in her favorite color, making her smile.
That caregiver kneels on the bathroom floor, helping your mother to change her pants after she had an accident, and laughs at the joke she just told, even when they don't find the joke funny.
That caregiver loves seeing your mother happy, and is happy when your mother is well taken care of.
Yes, that caregiver wipes your mother's butt.
That caregiver sits with your mother, holding her had as she is dying, allowing you to take some time for yourself, and mourns the loss of your mother when she does die.
That caregiver that you think only wipes your mothers butt is the person who is with your mother day in and day out, loving, caring, cleaning, and loving your mother when you can't do it anymore.
That caregiver isn't rich monetarily. But they are rich in something else--rich in love and memories.
That caregiver makes a difference and is more than what you think and see.
Tuesday, July 30, 2019
Tuesday, January 29, 2019
Life in Assisted Living
It's been a while since I posted anything here. Since late September I have been working at an assisted living facility close to home. Of course there are the good days and bad days, but you get used to it. This type of work isn't for everyone. There are some things that I've realized that a lot of people don't understand about doing this type of work.
1. Call lights are the things of nightmares. Just wait until you wake up thinking you fell asleep at work and that all the call lights are going off.
2. There are days when you get excited because you just checked a resident who seemed to have pooped every time you checked their brief, and this time they hadn't pooped.
3. You can't adequately describe some residents to your family or friends. You just have to experience those residents to understand.
4. Poop isn't that disturbing. It's normal. A pan that once had chocolate cake is more disturbing.
5. There's always that resident who will say things to you that make you laugh.
6. There are days when you are able to identify which resident that one item of clothing is, but you don't even remember what you have in your own closet except for your scrubs.
7. You get attached to the residents, and you know that when one of them dies you'll have to deal with the emotions of loosing someone you became attached too.
8. Being able to sit down to eat a meal while at work? When does that ever happen?
9. Only your co-workers understand what you mean when you say "resident's name-ism" or "Oh that's just so-and-so".
10. In the end you love your job.
1. Call lights are the things of nightmares. Just wait until you wake up thinking you fell asleep at work and that all the call lights are going off.
2. There are days when you get excited because you just checked a resident who seemed to have pooped every time you checked their brief, and this time they hadn't pooped.
3. You can't adequately describe some residents to your family or friends. You just have to experience those residents to understand.
4. Poop isn't that disturbing. It's normal. A pan that once had chocolate cake is more disturbing.
5. There's always that resident who will say things to you that make you laugh.
6. There are days when you are able to identify which resident that one item of clothing is, but you don't even remember what you have in your own closet except for your scrubs.
7. You get attached to the residents, and you know that when one of them dies you'll have to deal with the emotions of loosing someone you became attached too.
8. Being able to sit down to eat a meal while at work? When does that ever happen?
9. Only your co-workers understand what you mean when you say "resident's name-ism" or "Oh that's just so-and-so".
10. In the end you love your job.
Tuesday, August 29, 2017
Life updates
It's been a while since I last posted, and as I thought about it, I realized that not only had it been a while, a lot has happened since my last post. So here's the update on what has been happening in my life since the end of April.
I worked 20+ hours a week at Panera Bread this summer. It was a little weird not being at camp this summer. The first couple of weeks of June were a little rough for me--I wasn't at camp, was seeing posts about camp from my camp friends, but knew that I was right where I needed to be for the time being. There are the customers at Panera Bread that are regulars, and now that I won't be working as many hours with school, I'm going to miss seeing them and the conversations that I got to have with them.
There was one day this summer that was a slower day at Panera. I was doing dishes, and was making a nice dent in the giant pile that I had inherited. Sure, doing the dishes wasn't the most enjoyable task, but I did enjoy the way that I was able to see (as witnessed by the pile of dishes), that I had been productive that day. There have been the busy days at Panera too. There were days when it seemed like ever making a dent in the dishes, making all the orders, making all the deliveries, and keeping my sanity seemed impossible.
Of course I wish I could have spent the summer at camp. Yet, being at Panera I made some new friends. There is something to be said about the difference between being able to eat tasty Panera Bread on occasion, and homemade food instead of the camp food this summer.
In early August my parents and I made the trip to the family reunion. Although we didn't have the greatest weather for the reunion, it was nice to get to spend time with family. On the nicest day we had while at the reunion, we have several people swim the 2.5 miles of the chain of lakes. I was not one of those swimmers, but one of the four man/woman team escort on two paddle boards and one canoe.
And now the semester is beginning. I may not be a huge fan of the stats class I have to take, but at least I won't have to take any more math after this.
Off to do a little reading for one of my classes before another!
I worked 20+ hours a week at Panera Bread this summer. It was a little weird not being at camp this summer. The first couple of weeks of June were a little rough for me--I wasn't at camp, was seeing posts about camp from my camp friends, but knew that I was right where I needed to be for the time being. There are the customers at Panera Bread that are regulars, and now that I won't be working as many hours with school, I'm going to miss seeing them and the conversations that I got to have with them.
There was one day this summer that was a slower day at Panera. I was doing dishes, and was making a nice dent in the giant pile that I had inherited. Sure, doing the dishes wasn't the most enjoyable task, but I did enjoy the way that I was able to see (as witnessed by the pile of dishes), that I had been productive that day. There have been the busy days at Panera too. There were days when it seemed like ever making a dent in the dishes, making all the orders, making all the deliveries, and keeping my sanity seemed impossible.
Of course I wish I could have spent the summer at camp. Yet, being at Panera I made some new friends. There is something to be said about the difference between being able to eat tasty Panera Bread on occasion, and homemade food instead of the camp food this summer.
In early August my parents and I made the trip to the family reunion. Although we didn't have the greatest weather for the reunion, it was nice to get to spend time with family. On the nicest day we had while at the reunion, we have several people swim the 2.5 miles of the chain of lakes. I was not one of those swimmers, but one of the four man/woman team escort on two paddle boards and one canoe.
And now the semester is beginning. I may not be a huge fan of the stats class I have to take, but at least I won't have to take any more math after this.
Off to do a little reading for one of my classes before another!
Friday, April 28, 2017
Thoughts from the past
I opened the first Bible I was ever given for the first time in months. I've been reading the most recent addition to my collection of Bibles as of recently, so I hadn't seen my underlines, highlights, and notes to myself in my first Bible. As I flipped through the pages, trying to figure out what I wanted to read, I saw a few notes I had written myself a little over a year ago. One of those notes was:
As I saw both of these notes, I couldn't help but smile. Both of those notes to myself were written shortly after I arrived back at SpringHill last summer. I had been through a rough spring, and during those first days back at camp, I was beginning to realize that I was learning and growing and that God's plan(s) for me were better than any plan I could make.
It was during those first few days that I found myself reading Psalm 142, 143, and 146.
Since I returned home from camp in August, Matthew 6:5-15 and John 13:1-20 have been the parts of the Bible I have been stuck on. These are where Jesus teaches what is now known as the Lord's Prayer, and the washing of the feet. Thinking about it now, God might just have me stuck on those two passages now for a reason. At camp, I rarely thought about myself but about others. I was constantly thinking about the campers and their needs, and what I could do to help my co-workers. I'm still learning how to be that kind of servant, the kind of servant that Jesus was when he washed the disciple's feet, outside of camp.
And there's that line from the Lord's prayer:
There was that one week during the summer that changed my thoughts about what my future held-especially what God was asking me to do and be. It isn't my will, but God's will. I am most defiantly still a work in progress. I am still learning and growing. But being stuck on those two passages as of late is a good thing---they remind me of things that I need to remember.
"God has a plan for me!"Another was:
"Sometimes the answer is yes, sometimes it is no, sometimes it is later."
As I saw both of these notes, I couldn't help but smile. Both of those notes to myself were written shortly after I arrived back at SpringHill last summer. I had been through a rough spring, and during those first days back at camp, I was beginning to realize that I was learning and growing and that God's plan(s) for me were better than any plan I could make.
It was during those first few days that I found myself reading Psalm 142, 143, and 146.
"When my spirit is faint, you know my way." Psalm 142:3
"Teach me to do your will, for you are my God. Let your good spirit lead me on a level path." Psalm 143:10
"The Lord lifts up the downtrodden; he cast the wicked to the ground." Psalm 146:6When I think about what happened last April and May, I can understand exactly why I was stuck in those three Psalms.
Since I returned home from camp in August, Matthew 6:5-15 and John 13:1-20 have been the parts of the Bible I have been stuck on. These are where Jesus teaches what is now known as the Lord's Prayer, and the washing of the feet. Thinking about it now, God might just have me stuck on those two passages now for a reason. At camp, I rarely thought about myself but about others. I was constantly thinking about the campers and their needs, and what I could do to help my co-workers. I'm still learning how to be that kind of servant, the kind of servant that Jesus was when he washed the disciple's feet, outside of camp.
And there's that line from the Lord's prayer:
Thy will be done
There was that one week during the summer that changed my thoughts about what my future held-especially what God was asking me to do and be. It isn't my will, but God's will. I am most defiantly still a work in progress. I am still learning and growing. But being stuck on those two passages as of late is a good thing---they remind me of things that I need to remember.
Monday, March 20, 2017
God's Got You
"I life my eyes to the mountains--where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip--he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord watches over you--the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm--he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore." Psalm 121
In recent days, I've been thinking a lot about the past year. This past year was one where I put myself out there for a job that I didn't think I would get, only to be offered the very same position. It was a year that sent me from being excited about a new possibility to a place where I had so many questions about life. Around this time last year, I was dealing with a lot of anxiety.
After being let go from that job, I ended up accepting a summer position at SpringHill Camps Michigan overnight location. I was glad to have a plan for the summer. What I didn't know at the time was that God wanted me back at SpringHill for a reason.
During my time at SpringHill in 2014, I began to understand what God's voice sounds like to me.
During my time at SpringHill in 2015, I began to trust that God had a plan for me, and that if I did what I could do within my own, very human, power, God would make amazing things happen and make sure I ended up right where He wanted me.
Looking back at it, as I drove towards camp at the beginning of last summer, I felt like I was headed home. I was so excited to be back at camp, a place where I did feel at home, and where I knew that I would learn something.
As I walked towards where check in for staff training was going to be held, I could see the day camp staff who would be heading out later that day having fun. I could also see members of the Michigan overnight locations summer leaderships staff and members of the year round staff relaxing. I continued walking, and quickly recognized a number of people that I had known the past two summers. As I got closer to them, they noticed me. Of course they made their way over to me and gave me so many hugs.
One of those first people to reach out and hug me was someone that I had reached out to one year ago today via Facebook. I still remember the two of hugging, and could feel the tears near the surface. This was a woman who had been there, who had been someone I had been able to lean on when I was struggling.
During the course of training I was wrecked. Yet I found myself learning, growing, and finding my way forward.
Did I know what this past fall would bring? No. But I knew that whatever it brought, God would be right there with me.
In the past year, I realized the job I had as a cook at an assisted living facility wasn't where God wanted me in the long term. I realized that God wanted me at that facility for a while, and that He wanted me back at SpringHill all along. I realized that the time spent with a host of two year old kids this fall was a time that God was reminding me how to be a playful adult that embraces aspects of who they were at two.
And now that I'm in school and working part time at Panera Bread?
I don't know what next year will look like, but I know that God has a plan. I know that the kid that was all excited about his soup on Monday, and who gave me a hug and high-five made me smile and brought out the kid in me. I know that my co-workers always find ways to make me smile during every shift that I work.
I also know that God's got me.
In recent days, I've been thinking a lot about the past year. This past year was one where I put myself out there for a job that I didn't think I would get, only to be offered the very same position. It was a year that sent me from being excited about a new possibility to a place where I had so many questions about life. Around this time last year, I was dealing with a lot of anxiety.
After being let go from that job, I ended up accepting a summer position at SpringHill Camps Michigan overnight location. I was glad to have a plan for the summer. What I didn't know at the time was that God wanted me back at SpringHill for a reason.
During my time at SpringHill in 2014, I began to understand what God's voice sounds like to me.
During my time at SpringHill in 2015, I began to trust that God had a plan for me, and that if I did what I could do within my own, very human, power, God would make amazing things happen and make sure I ended up right where He wanted me.
Looking back at it, as I drove towards camp at the beginning of last summer, I felt like I was headed home. I was so excited to be back at camp, a place where I did feel at home, and where I knew that I would learn something.
As I walked towards where check in for staff training was going to be held, I could see the day camp staff who would be heading out later that day having fun. I could also see members of the Michigan overnight locations summer leaderships staff and members of the year round staff relaxing. I continued walking, and quickly recognized a number of people that I had known the past two summers. As I got closer to them, they noticed me. Of course they made their way over to me and gave me so many hugs.
One of those first people to reach out and hug me was someone that I had reached out to one year ago today via Facebook. I still remember the two of hugging, and could feel the tears near the surface. This was a woman who had been there, who had been someone I had been able to lean on when I was struggling.
During the course of training I was wrecked. Yet I found myself learning, growing, and finding my way forward.
Did I know what this past fall would bring? No. But I knew that whatever it brought, God would be right there with me.
In the past year, I realized the job I had as a cook at an assisted living facility wasn't where God wanted me in the long term. I realized that God wanted me at that facility for a while, and that He wanted me back at SpringHill all along. I realized that the time spent with a host of two year old kids this fall was a time that God was reminding me how to be a playful adult that embraces aspects of who they were at two.
And now that I'm in school and working part time at Panera Bread?
I don't know what next year will look like, but I know that God has a plan. I know that the kid that was all excited about his soup on Monday, and who gave me a hug and high-five made me smile and brought out the kid in me. I know that my co-workers always find ways to make me smile during every shift that I work.
I also know that God's got me.
Monday, January 9, 2017
From August until now
Since August a lot has happened.
In August I came home to a whole host of new experiences. I actually had to give a child a quick bath in a sink at one point after they had incident of "exploding poop". I started singing in the choir at church, and have love every minute of it. There was a moment where a two-year-old I was taking care of was laying on their cot trying to fall asleep, and she reached up towards the ceiling, and whispered "I'm reaching up to God" to me. There were days where, the two-year-olds I worked with would come rushing over to me when I arrived at work to hug me and say hello. I've been through countless interviews since August, and have experienced some highs and lows.
November was a rough month for me. The election happened, and Trump won, which was not what I had hoped would happen. In late November friend of mine from high school killed her own father, then herself. Two days later, a camper I had worked with at SpringHill Camps ended her own life. I was glad when November was over.
Looking back at September and October, things were going well, and as planned. November was rough, and December was hit and miss for good and bad things.
Looking back at June through August, there was a lot going on with camp and with the understanding that was coming from a lot of conversations with friends and with God, which lead me to apply to Saginaw Valley State University (SVSU), and get in.
That brings me to today. Today is my first day of classes at SVSU, and I am so PUMPED! It's hard to believe that five months after first beginning to understand where God wanted me to head in the long run, I am finally beginning that journey.
In August I came home to a whole host of new experiences. I actually had to give a child a quick bath in a sink at one point after they had incident of "exploding poop". I started singing in the choir at church, and have love every minute of it. There was a moment where a two-year-old I was taking care of was laying on their cot trying to fall asleep, and she reached up towards the ceiling, and whispered "I'm reaching up to God" to me. There were days where, the two-year-olds I worked with would come rushing over to me when I arrived at work to hug me and say hello. I've been through countless interviews since August, and have experienced some highs and lows.
November was a rough month for me. The election happened, and Trump won, which was not what I had hoped would happen. In late November friend of mine from high school killed her own father, then herself. Two days later, a camper I had worked with at SpringHill Camps ended her own life. I was glad when November was over.
Looking back at September and October, things were going well, and as planned. November was rough, and December was hit and miss for good and bad things.
Looking back at June through August, there was a lot going on with camp and with the understanding that was coming from a lot of conversations with friends and with God, which lead me to apply to Saginaw Valley State University (SVSU), and get in.
That brings me to today. Today is my first day of classes at SVSU, and I am so PUMPED! It's hard to believe that five months after first beginning to understand where God wanted me to head in the long run, I am finally beginning that journey.
Saturday, August 13, 2016
Being Wrecked
Being wrecked by God is something that I've watched happen to staff and campers at camp every summer since 2014. In 2014 and 2015, God wrecked me, but never as often as he did this summer. During the course of this summer God wrecked me on so many occasions that I lost track of the exact number of times.
During training, we spent one evening with the TST staff (the staff that worked with the high school campers), doing the prayer walk. During the prayer walk, the signs that kids would read throughout the summer talked about letting go of one's baggage. I still don't remember what the sign that got me said. Yet, I remember that it said something that reminded me of holy week and something that I experienced in 2002 at Stony Lake Lutheran Camp. As I thought about that single week in 2002 during the prayer walk, I knew that I had baggage that I was carrying with me at all times, and that somehow this was going to be a summer that I was going experience something amazing.
That night, we had a time of worship for the staff. After the TST director spoke, the music began, and leadership spread out throughout the auditorium so that all of the summer staff could go to them to be prayed for. I knew that I needed a lot of prayer in that moment. I had already been through so much since the beginning of the year. I could feel the tears just under the surface. I knew what I had been carrying around with me, and that I just wanted God to take that baggage from me. Having been hugged by the TST director, and having been prayed over by her, I couldn't contain my tears any longer. All the feelings I had been containing for so long now were spilling over in the form of tears. As I walked to the back of the auditorium to get some space so that I could spend some time alone in prayer, I looked up to see someone I met in 2014 at SpringHill. The moment she saw me, she grabbed me. Not only did she hug me, she listened as I told the story of what I had experienced since January. It was after having heard what I had experienced that she prayed over me. The tears that were flowing slowed, and eventually ceased.
I wasn't my "normal" self yet. But I knew that God had my back, and that things were going to get better.
The next morning, as I sat in the auditorium, I realized that I felt like myself again--all the anxiety I had been holding in for so long was gone. I knew that God had taken my anxieties. Having talked about sharing our testimonies with campers, we split into pairs to share our testimonies with someone we didn't know yet before going into solo time. After solo time we all returned to the auditorium for more worship time.
It was during that worship time that I was able to fully worship for the first time this summer. By the last song, I knew that I needed to sit down and pray. I had realized that I hadn't taken any of our down time to really spend time with God. As I sat there in prayer, the band played on. Eventually it was announced that the band would continue playing for a few minutes so that people could continue to worship if they wanted, but that we were all dismissed for lunch. I knew that I needed that time alone with God, so I stayed sitting in that chair. Minutes passed, and I began feeling my energy returning. Eventually someone that started the same summer I did came over and prayed over me.
During the summer there was one night that the band played In Christ Alone. Here a few lines of the lyrics:
And as He stands in victory
Sin has lost it's grip on me
and I am His and He is mine
bought with the precious blood of Christ...
...No power of hell
no scheme of man
can every pluck me from His hand
'till He returns
or calls me home
here in the power of Christ I stand
It was as I sang those lyrics for the first time this summer, I knew that God had a plan for me, and that this was going to be a summer during which I was going to begin to understand that plan. I also couldn't help but think about that moment in 2002 at Stony Lake that I fully understood what Jesus did for us by dying on the cross. Just the way that I felt God working throughout the summer wrecked me. Sometimes it was a song lyric like those from In Christ Alone that reminded me of something I had learned years before, and sometimes a lyric would be a good reminder of the fact that God created me perfectly. Sometimes I watched as the kids I was working with were wrecked during worship, and then show me God in a way I hadn't expected him.
I hope and pray that God continues to wreck me from time to time. I hope that other people are wrecked by Him too. Feeling God in that way is so powerful!
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